I couldn’t figure out what my 7-year-old was thinking or feeling. She felt unreachable to me. As I was talking with a friend about this, she shared that she felt the same about her 7-year-old. It wasn’t that they were 7; it was that they seemed to have inner voices we couldn’t access -- as my friend put it. We did the thing where we fear spiraled -- what will happen if we never figure out how to connect with our children? Who will they turn to instead? Will their self-esteem deteriorate? Will they withdraw further into themselves?
I knew I had to connect with her, so I went home and started writing notes to her, telling her about myself and asking her questions about herself. She. LOVED. It.
Right away, I learned that she saw value in herself as she wrote to me about a really touching observation of her talents. Soon, I learned about her fears -- things I had never known; things that stewed around inside of her and bothered her a great deal. These things were taking up so much of her brain space and preventing her from always being herself. I learned silly things about her and shared silly things about myself. I learned who was important to her in her life.
And these bits of information were so valuable to me. Suddenly, I understood a fear of hers and could gently coach her through it. Suddenly, I knew what she valued, and could provide more of that in our interactions. Suddenly, I knew what excited her, and I could show her love in ways that were meaningful to her. Suddenly, I knew how she felt about herself, and I could encourage the beautiful parts and strengthen the parts she didn’t love.
Suddenly, I knew her.
After a while, I realized I had stumbled on one of the best ways to connect with this particular child, and I knew I needed to share this with the world. I can't adequately express how meaningful it is to know the things I now know -- because of our back-and-forth journal.
The Pause and Connect Journal I created is fun. From the coloring page cover that you and your child can decorate together to the prompts that get you both sharing, the whole experience is a delight.
But it’s more than just fun. It’s about going deep and connecting with your child. It’s about understanding your child in new ways so that your daily interactions can be more meaningful.
But we're moms, and we don’t have a ton of time! So the journal gives you quick chances to share and learn -- opportunities to really understand and connect with your child in a matter of minutes.