My family and I recently traveled to Salem, Massachusetts and learned about the witch trials. While there, we also learned a bit about modern-day witchcraft. Unsurprisingly, we learned that many stereotypes are false. I’m not an authority on witchcraft, but what I learned about it was actually similar to what most people I know believe. Yes, probably even you.
I hate that humans do this to each other — we turn groups of people into villains and caricatures until the general public sees those groups as enemies. And sadly, as in the case of the Salem Witch Trials and countless other groups in the world’s history, this behavior can lead to ruined lives… or even death.
It has probably happened to you in some form. You’re likely part of a group in which your beliefs/race/culture/hair color/profession/size/gender/side of town/school/neurodiversity/political party/age/etc. has been villainized, turned into a caricature, weaponized, mocked, and more.
We Need to Stop and Notice
I think it is a lifelong challenge and project for each of us to notice our biases, bring them to the surface, work through them, and iron them out — over and over.
And one of the most important places where we need to do this is within our own families.
Because you know what?
Children are villainized. Kids are turned into caricatures. Children are made into the enemies of parents.
It’s true. Traditional parenting and popular influencers tell us that our children are manipulative brats when they melt down; that we are poor, long-suffering parents.
We are told that we need to “come down hard.” To punish. To withhold privileges until our children do what we say.
But we actually need to challenge our biases toward children.
Are Children Bad?
Are children really bad? Do they really need to be punished so they can “learn their lessons”? Is that bias really helpful? When we think about it, is it fair? Is it kind?
If you feel like your child is not the villain and you want a more connected, kind approach for interacting with them and bringing peace to your home, that’s what I’m here for.
In the past, I was sucked into the bias that society taught me about children. But through connection, I’ve found a happier, more peaceful, better approach to helping my children know how to manage their behavior — and to help me stop yelling, stop punishing, and start connecting.
You can do this too. (Believe me. If I can, you can!)
Start small with my back-and-forth journal that helps you to get to know your child in simple ways — even when you’re busy. The insights parents get from their children as they answer the prompts has been revelatory and life-changing for families.
If you’re ready for more — you’re ready to learn how to help your children make better decisions without yelling at them; you’re ready to have confidence to know what to do when your child refuses, whines, complains, hits, bites, and more — check out my self-guided course, How to Stop Yelling.
